If you’re parenting a toddler, you know firsthand that transitions can be some of the hardest parts of your day and often lead to tantrums. Take a look below to see what techniques our early childhood mental health specialist, Priscilla Tebelman, LMFT, recommends trying at home!
Here are 5 of Pricilla’s favorite preventative, aka “let’s try to get ahead of it,” tips for smoother routines while supporting your toddler’s development.
-First, Breathe
But seriously, take a breath- in through your nose, out through your mouth-
The level of stress facing parents today is high, and it is easy to get swept away in the hustle and bustle, making us RUSH through every transition to the next thing. Take moments to slow down even a little bit. If you are feeling better during the transition, so will your child.
– Clear & Realistic Expectations
Expect protest and “NO” responses. Oftentimes, I talk with parents about our overly ambitious hope that our children will always say ” yes ” and always want to do what WE want them to do. Yes, we want them to learn to follow our lead and have smoother transitions; however, it is developmentally appropriate if they have preferences, want to keep playing or have a hard time sitting at a restaurant. That makes it our job to have realistic expectations for our children in order to manage our own emotions, too.
-Visuals
I LOVE using visuals with our littles when it comes to daily routines. It provides more predictability AND promotes a sense of “I can do it!” It is also an alternative to overly using verbal requests to remind our children of what comes next.
EXAMPLE: Picture lists for our morning or bedtime routine. With practice, your child will be able to tell YOU what comes next.
-Don’t Fall in the Trap of Over Repeating Yourself
It is so easy to say the same thing over and over again, only to get nowhere and become super frustrated. Remember, toddlers can only process and respond to 1 request at a time, and often, they need help tuning into what we are asking of them. If we have asked twice and no progress is made, we need to change our next tactic. Imagine someone repeating themselves and giving you 2-3 requests each time you needed to move on in your routine- that would be overwhelming.
-Bring in a “Friend” for Backup
Use a stuffed animal, doll, or favorite character to help model and provide encouragement during transitions or following through with requests.
Example: This might look like Mickey Mouse saying “bye” to the playground or our elephant stuffy helping clean up with toys before we go get pajamas on, while the elephant also gives high fives to your child as they help clean up.
If you have any questions about Priscilla’s tips for managing transitions at home or would like to schedule an appointment with one of our specialists, please contact our office at 858-692-4197 // contact@sdkidsfirst.com, and we will be happy to help you!